Mutual Friends Don’t Mean You Should Be-Friend

A young girl of about eight sat hunched over the family laptop, creating a skype account. After faking her age and forgetting to apply privacy settings, she received a call from a user called “SexyT11” and due to the excitement of it all, accepted the call. The man on the other end was not only greatly over 13 (the fake age the girl had set) but also stark naked. As surprising as this may seem, this girl is not the only one to have had such an experience.

This website suggests that such horrifying experiences can be linked to lack of overall awareness and something called over-friending. Underlying the words “over friending” is the idea of adding those you wouldn’t normally trust with the information that is posted on most social media sites. According to this source, adding everyone you have ever come in contact with and their mutual friends leaves you vulnerable to dangerous people and possible predators. When a select group of 8th grade students from the english class 8-4JRa, 6 out of 11 people reveal that they have made the mistake of adding someone they don’t know or over-friending. ”

Shaleigh Harrington, another Grade 8 student, has also had many experiences with this issue. She is often friended by people she doesn’t know who then continue to message her until she is forced to block or report them. “I always just assume it’s someone I don’t know in the grade above or below, because of the number of contacts we share.” This evidence is significant because it reveals how very few people are aware of this issue and how serious it can become. Over friending can lead to strangers discovering all sorts of information they couldn’t have accessed previously.

Another source illustrates that a teenagers lack of privacy can also lead to objectionable advances. “One in five U.S. teenagers who regularly log on to the Internet says they have received an unwanted sexual solicitation on social media,” says the source. This shows that four people in each of your classes have possibly been exposed to something they might not cognitively been ready for. According to research, early exposure to crude content could increase the risk of a child becoming a victim of sexual violence or the probability of them acting out sexually against another child. Both of which are extremely dangerous and harmful for the well being of the person as well as their classmates.

Furthermore, this resource offers evidence that 82% of online sex crimes against minors, the offender uses the victim's social networking site to gain information. When over friending is added into the mix, this leaves a teenager’s private information in a vulnerable position. “The offenders can use flattery and sympathy to get the teenager to oblige with what they request, ” states David Finkelhor from the Crimes against Children Research Center. “Their requests can range from provocative pictures to meeting in deserted locations, both of which can harm the youth’s well being” continued another source. This information suggests, that a predator targets a person’s hormones and insecurity are both at a peak in their teen years which makes the predator’s methods more effective.

Social media has now become such a constant in most young lives that finding a way to ensure privacy seems nearly impossible. Finding a safe space to be able to share parts of your life without having to deal with unwanted attention becomes a necessity in protection from harassment and content that is too mature for some people’s comfort. According to unnamed sources, “(in) large parts this lack of privacy can be tracked down to not further investigating when you don’t recognize someone’s name or picture.” Other steps that can be taken to ensure protection would include only befriending those that can be trusted with all details you reveal on your social media websites. If an invasive or bothersome person does gain access to your information and starts harassing you, the next best step is to let someone in a position of authority or maturity know. “Of all those teenagers targeted by predators, only 25% then report back to an adult,” reports this source. Mature adults can be essential in restoring privacy and dealing with a dangerous individual, especially for vulnerable underage people. The final step in ensuring that your profile isn’t the target of crude comments and disturbing acts is to report and block all individuals that make you uncomfortable or invade your privacy.

Written by Akanksha Shukla.

Are Parents Pushing Kids Too Hard?

On Monday the 8th of September , an eighth grader was seen in the UWCSEA East karate dojo, After school. He was seen talking to Shihan, the head instructor about joining the activity. The 8th grader , was new to martial arts , whereas his older brother had joined the dojo 4 years prior. As this reporter noted when watching the class, the difference of four years of practice was huge. Even though the older sibling had only been doing this martial art for four years, he had attended practices multiple times a week and went to most of the sparring tournaments and gradings.

Meanwhile, the younger sibling was struggling through the vigorous stretching exercises and warm ups, and evidently unused to and uncomfortable with his surroundings. In other words, out of his element. His stance is off and his movements uncertain, always keeping one eye on the instructor and one eye on his older brother. His older brother on the other hand was completely in his element. The older sibling runs through the exercises with confidence, sometimes getting called on by the teacher to count and lead the class, sometimes used as a demonstration example.

As a chinese saying goes “ Practice for 10 years, perform for 10 seconds”. It means you may have to practice many years to become good at something, and the brothers are a great example of the effects of hard practice. Research shows that it takes approximately 10 years to become an “expert” at something. Many people take this to heart, especially parents. As statistics show, many asian families enroll their children into extra curricular activities at an early age and important school subjects such as math, science and english.

Music in particular is a common one. Research shows that studying an instrument helps develop children. Learning to play an instrument requires hand eye coordination, determination and diligence, all good traits to have. But when is enough? Surely there is a limit on how hard you can push a child before their spirit breaks? The true dilemma is how hard to push children. Is it a waste to spend the first few years of a childs life on fun and play, instead of enrolling them in several activities in preparation of school? Or is it more of a waste to let the child grow up without carefree memories of toddlerhood and grow up a smart successful person? Is it right to deprive a young child of happiness? Many parents ponder this, and in this day and age, this could mean the difference between a happy childhood and a depressed one.

Written by Jasmine