The Perks of Being a Wallflower: Self Identity

In “The Perks of Being a Wallflower,” Stephen Chbosky manipulates a coming of age account of a traumatised teenage boy. This is in order to explore how exposure to new people and situations expands a person's understanding of themselves, but can leave them unsure about their identity when these people or situations are removed.

Before the narrative’s meaning comes across, the title, “The Perks of Being a Wallflower”, itself provides commentary on social outcasts. Charlie, the protagonist, is a character who prefers to observe and understand rather than participate. “‘He [Charlie] is a wallflower [...] You see things. You keep quiet about them. And you understand.” Chbosky’s metaphor is implicitly evident throughout the story, drawing parallels to actual wallflowers and what they require in order to flourish. Wallflowers grow slowly, but with access to pollination from “social butterflies” and exposure to things like sunlight they develop just like the others. Charlie represents this wallflower, slowly drawn out by the new people he meets. At times Charlie, struggles with remaining open when these people are removed, but eventually learns to strive all on his own.

To begin with, Chbosky hauntingly portrays Charlie’s ache for companionship through his desperate letters sent out to a stranger. “I just need to know that someone out there listens and understand [...]” starts Charlie, before he goes on to explain why these letters are being mailed out. From this sentence, and the first few letters that Charlie writes to this person, the reader is able to infer that Charlie doesn’t have much social support and is looking for someone to simply be there for him.

If self-identity is defined as being sure of yourself, your likes, dislikes and your relationships with others, Charlie doesn’t truly develop one until near the end of the novel. He isn’t quite sure of his ability to cope with pain, especially without his friends as a distraction, and is constantly fearful of returning to the bad mental place he was in before the book began. In his very last letter he states “believe it or not, I’m really not afraid of going,” in context of the first day of his sophomore year, even though all of his friends have departed. In comparison to his first letter where he states his fear for his first day of freshman year due to his lack of friends and support system. This shows how as the book progressed his positive experience when approaching someone in an uncomfortable situation taught him to open up to new people and go out of his way to create relationships.

Charlie’s journey and development throughout the book also explores the pressures that society places on the youth to only partake in activities they are well versed in. “‘Well are you dancing at these dances?’ ‘I’m not very good dancer’”. Charlie’s fear of judgment leads to lack of participation which results in a lack of experience and exposure. This lack of experience and exposure lessens his idea of what he likes and dislikes, a great part of any person’s identity. With help from his friends, and his english teacher, Charlie slowly learns to disregard this pressure and steps out of his comfort zone to learn more about his peers and himself. “In terms of participation in things, I am trying to go to school events they set up in my school [...] Things like the homecoming football game and the dance even if I don’t have a date.” Once he starts doing this, he gains confidence in himself individually, even without the support of having someone by his side through unfamiliar circumstances.

As his confidence grows, Charlie begins to value his self discovery and constantly tries new things in order to further discover who he is as a person. One example of this is showcased through his love of certain music. “Before we left the party, Sam played me a few of her favourite songs.” Charlie’s exposure to different kinds of music starts with his sister’s boyfriend and slowly extends to his new friends Sam and Patrick. Soon after being introduced to the power of music, he realises the importance of “belong[ing] to something when [you’re] sad” and how music can unite a large group of people. This exposure is relevant in his journey, as it gives him a coping mechanism, which later allows his to build his independence and teaches him to survive without help from his friends. Charlie’s growth is evident in many different scenarios, but the authentication of Chbosky’s manipulation of Charlie’s growth is showed in the last letter he ever writes. He ends the letter by stating “I’m not sure if I will have the time to write any more letters because I might be too busy trying to ‘participate’”. This not only shows he has grown out of his fear of participation, but also reveals his want for self identity and a diverse knowledge in his likes and dislikes.

In conclusion, Charlie battles through his struggle with codependency to prove that learning about yourself from others helps you build your confidence, but true self identity is knowing that you can flourish without them.

By Akanksha